really i wonder at times how cleverly people put their deceptive acts on others ignorance and innocence!!! really hats off to the drama and hats off to those who acted in it. my dear long distance chachaji created the whole drama and well coolly implanted me in the culprit part by the help of my dear long distance sister!! really i wish to CLAP hands for them and congratulate them for this bravo act!!!! QUIET DISGUSTING HA! A COMPLETE RUBBISH..... ghor kalyug prabhu.. ghor kalyug....
Friday, 19 April 2013
Thursday, 18 April 2013
expectations and reactions- think before you speak!!!
some times you never expect a backfire and a shot in the eye opens up your eyes and many situations. it is easy to blame always but i guess to accept your fault and to clear out the tricky situation,if you believe its not your fault.. makes life smoother for all. till date very less people have backfired me.. i guess now that may be there will be more people than i expect who would wish to back fire me!!!! anyways.. a bit lengthy discussion with chachaji opened my eyes in some ways... at least i guess now i should be keep my mouth shut ... rest i will discuss later... as i have more things to do now....
Tuesday, 9 April 2013
the thunder stopped!!
yes... today is a new dawn. a dawn so bright and promising... a dawn so relaxing in all imaginable ways. a dawn that brings new hope to enjoy the life the way it is. but before i describe more about this new dawn i wonder about the "22" pagevisits..... despite of my setting the browser not to count my pageviews is it ever possible in the slightest way that i have already invited this curious yet ever silent world to start peeping into my closed and well guarded world. if so, something makes me uncomfortable. though i had tried to open up but, to know that some spectators have already been included. doesnt make me very enthusiastic.and somewhere i again start wondering about the longevity of this blog too. the unsocial i am, even my facebook account cries for its existence at times.
anyways, somewhere i should expect netizens to be peeping inside my world now, if this blog is going to be online...at least they dont know my name and identity; if that helps to make me a bit relaxed! coming back to my bright morning... well though my morning didnt start in an optimistic way... moreover the pounding headache that i have...(it is the aftermath of the fights with my husband- a proof of how much i love him and the way it effects me if he is angry). it was his voice that broke my dream today morning.... an angry voice to be precise.... dont expect some rosy romantic moments between us after fights.... those days are gone already! but, slowly with the passage of time he did understand my requests and gave in to my neccesities finally. the requests or rather pleads i was making since yesterday night and the way he was a dammed about my requests. after all these fights i really wonder why do i make him so angry at times.but again, is it all my fault alone? or again we both are responsible for it. but, these fights affects us equally. anyways, now that he has accepted to my "pleads".. we both are back to pavilion again. hence, the life goes on.. slowly yet steadily, at times... with some bumps and humps...and some dumps!!! (if that adds to some poetry!) hmmm now that reminds me that it is around 10 in the morning already and i am still busy with my computer and hey! my daughter is calling me for her breakfast..........................................the life has come back to normal with the thunder and storm all settled and packed up till the next rough weather forecast which, mostly happens around every fortnights. and for those who think "every fortnight!- my my how much we fight" sorry to say.. but thats how "less" we fight. coz i have successfully pushed the graph of fight down from each day to 15 days... and constantly trying to extend it forward soon as my kid is growing fast. but, one thing is for sure... i promise.. we wont stop fighting ever!!! coz the most important fact is that you fight only with those whom you care and love... for rest all... you choose to ignore!!!!!!
anyways, somewhere i should expect netizens to be peeping inside my world now, if this blog is going to be online...at least they dont know my name and identity; if that helps to make me a bit relaxed! coming back to my bright morning... well though my morning didnt start in an optimistic way... moreover the pounding headache that i have...(it is the aftermath of the fights with my husband- a proof of how much i love him and the way it effects me if he is angry). it was his voice that broke my dream today morning.... an angry voice to be precise.... dont expect some rosy romantic moments between us after fights.... those days are gone already! but, slowly with the passage of time he did understand my requests and gave in to my neccesities finally. the requests or rather pleads i was making since yesterday night and the way he was a dammed about my requests. after all these fights i really wonder why do i make him so angry at times.but again, is it all my fault alone? or again we both are responsible for it. but, these fights affects us equally. anyways, now that he has accepted to my "pleads".. we both are back to pavilion again. hence, the life goes on.. slowly yet steadily, at times... with some bumps and humps...and some dumps!!! (if that adds to some poetry!) hmmm now that reminds me that it is around 10 in the morning already and i am still busy with my computer and hey! my daughter is calling me for her breakfast..........................................the life has come back to normal with the thunder and storm all settled and packed up till the next rough weather forecast which, mostly happens around every fortnights. and for those who think "every fortnight!- my my how much we fight" sorry to say.. but thats how "less" we fight. coz i have successfully pushed the graph of fight down from each day to 15 days... and constantly trying to extend it forward soon as my kid is growing fast. but, one thing is for sure... i promise.. we wont stop fighting ever!!! coz the most important fact is that you fight only with those whom you care and love... for rest all... you choose to ignore!!!!!!
the first step forward!
though a content writer by profession.. i dont have the writer within me. but. today is different, today my mind says that here is the day when you should try to speak your thoughts out to the world even if there is no audience to your long speeches and no spectators to my tears and laughters.
come lets start..... being a daughter was never so easy for me specially when my both parents were working. my silence dates back to those days when i first started going to school and somewhere my sufferings started from that time. there was nobody to hear what i wanted... only the pressure of what others wanted made me more silent day by day.. though strange enough, my teachers always complained about my talkative nature in class. many years have gone by and there are layers and layers of those blankets that i have put to shield my thoughts from those whom i cared., loved and expected. so,. with these dust clad blankets enter a new blanket in my life... the effort to shield my feelings. frustrations and tears from my daughter before she grows up enough to understand them. though somewhere i felt that today even she understood our fight and my tears and frustrations. trust me, to create this blanket is not easy, specially when you stay in a warm area of love, expectations and friendship. but. because it is absolutely necessary to create this blanket..... i am trying my best!
here i am talking about creating a blanket where the main motto of creating this blog was to start removing them one by one. but i guess this is ok for me initially as to opt for a new beginning you need to start with the old ones. also. the blog is ultimately my space for secret thoughts so i guess it is completely ok to sit and talk more about my feelings about anything i wish to share than to go with the name.
come lets start..... being a daughter was never so easy for me specially when my both parents were working. my silence dates back to those days when i first started going to school and somewhere my sufferings started from that time. there was nobody to hear what i wanted... only the pressure of what others wanted made me more silent day by day.. though strange enough, my teachers always complained about my talkative nature in class. many years have gone by and there are layers and layers of those blankets that i have put to shield my thoughts from those whom i cared., loved and expected. so,. with these dust clad blankets enter a new blanket in my life... the effort to shield my feelings. frustrations and tears from my daughter before she grows up enough to understand them. though somewhere i felt that today even she understood our fight and my tears and frustrations. trust me, to create this blanket is not easy, specially when you stay in a warm area of love, expectations and friendship. but. because it is absolutely necessary to create this blanket..... i am trying my best!
here i am talking about creating a blanket where the main motto of creating this blog was to start removing them one by one. but i guess this is ok for me initially as to opt for a new beginning you need to start with the old ones. also. the blog is ultimately my space for secret thoughts so i guess it is completely ok to sit and talk more about my feelings about anything i wish to share than to go with the name.
trying my best...
nothing in life is easy for us.. the women.. a mother. daughter and a wife... nothing is easy and so even expressing the thoughts so personal; into an open page like this will also not be easy.
how many times have i created blog like this and deleted them few minutes after creating them itself. how many times even the blogs go unnoticed..with forgetful mind and ever unsure heart.. those created blogs suffer from the "world wide web dust"! no no this is not the name of a new technology or so, but just an imaginary word.. like me and my thoughts and feelings.......... something which you cant see yet you can feel and read if you try to .. something that lies deep down me.. a place which is keyed and locked and the key is thrown in the water each time a feeling or a thought or at time certain frustrations enter into that secret space..
so come lets talk to this silent yet ever active world at a time when my daughter and husband is lost in their own respective goodnight sleeps. come lets open that secret little space of my heart bit by bit and let this silent world hear and share my pains. frustrations, happiness, expectations and desires and memories of things i have experienced or wish to experience..... hopefully i can successfully talk my heart out slowly and sensitively on certain issues which are common and others which are secret....
how many times have i created blog like this and deleted them few minutes after creating them itself. how many times even the blogs go unnoticed..with forgetful mind and ever unsure heart.. those created blogs suffer from the "world wide web dust"! no no this is not the name of a new technology or so, but just an imaginary word.. like me and my thoughts and feelings.......... something which you cant see yet you can feel and read if you try to .. something that lies deep down me.. a place which is keyed and locked and the key is thrown in the water each time a feeling or a thought or at time certain frustrations enter into that secret space..
so come lets talk to this silent yet ever active world at a time when my daughter and husband is lost in their own respective goodnight sleeps. come lets open that secret little space of my heart bit by bit and let this silent world hear and share my pains. frustrations, happiness, expectations and desires and memories of things i have experienced or wish to experience..... hopefully i can successfully talk my heart out slowly and sensitively on certain issues which are common and others which are secret....
celebrating womanhood
this is more like dairy than a blog... a space which is completely mine... a space that will elaborate my thoughts and wishes... something which is so personal yet so open....
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